I’ll grab something when I’m through!
…and something grabbed him that night!
Mr. Grabby was a busy sales executive. So very, very busy. Yes, all day he waved a piece of paper as he sat at a table with a phone on it. All day he said sneaky things on the phone. Sure, I can get you an incredible deal on the Brooklyn Bridge. Yeah, sure. If you buy it right this second, I can also have the entire bridge coated in 14 carat gold. Oh…and I’ll even throw in some – um – Danish pastries that were baked by the King of Denmark’s Royal Baker. No, really! They are regally delicious, I promise you. I just ate seven of them myself.
Mr. Grabby’s stomach starts to grumble and complain. Another ride on the worry-go-round, sloshing with bad coffee and semi-digested yeast.
Then that night, after another bout of “worry-go-round stomach” – after lashings of antacids and a few more cups of Brown Grit Coffee to wash the antacids down – the Thing appeared…
Yes, it was — the Giant Hand. You know the one I mean. It’s best friends with this guy’s Worry-Go-Round Stomach and it is very, very angry with Mr. Grabby.
–Hey, said the Giant Hand. You’re in Big Trouble. You’ve been messing with my friend. Grabbing crummy Danishes. Grabbing lousy coffee. Grabbing and gabbing. Well, that makes Giant Hand MAD.
–But I had to! I was busy talking on a small black phone all day while gesticulating with a blank piece of paper. It’s really stressful!
–Sorry, Charlie. Let’s go. I put you in big vat of Pepto Bismol. Try talking on little rotary phone while you do backstroke! [cue manaical laughter]
The moral: Never Upset an Upset Stomach. You never know what else you might upset.