But in this case, the devil blends mint jelly into the mayo. And of course her guests – some underlings she brought home - are very impressed with the Short Notice Salad.* Yum, tomatoes, pepper, pineapple and mint jelly mayo! You’re a genius, ma’am. No, really. You are.
Here is the recipe - if you really want to know. I rewrote some of this, because I didn’t want to write out the brand names over and over:
Short Notice Salad
1 medium-size tomato
1 medium-size green pepper
6 ounces cream cheese
2 Tbs mayo
1/4 tsp grated onion
4 slices pineapple [pineapple??]
10 slices unpeeled red apple
1/4 cup mint jelly
1 cup mayo [again with the mayo!]
Cut off tops of tomato and green pepper; remove seeds. Invert tomato to drain. Mix cream cheese with the 2 Tbs of you-know-what-brand mayo and the grated onion and pack in into the tomato and green pepper. Chill thoroughly and slice. Arrange lettuce leaves on chop plate [a chop plate is a serving platter, basically] with slices of tomato, pepper pineapple and apple. Serve with that cup of MAYO which has been blended with mint jelly.
“This is such a simple salad, but that extra dash of flavor in the mayonnaise lifts it far out of the commonplace.”
Uh huh, it does. And I’ll be lifting that chop plate right over the compost bin under my sink, if you don’t mind.
* My Short Notice Salad recipe:
1. Look in fridge, see some lettuce. Tear it up and wash it. Look in fridge some more. Oh look, half a can of tuna and some rotini! Oh, there’s the vinaigrette, no let me get it, it’s over there behind the Tupperware of – something. Hmm. That’s from awhile back…
2. Get everything out on counter.
3. Tell everyone to grab a plate and help themselves.
4. It is called Short Notice Salad because we’re a bit Short on ingredients but I hope no one will Notice.
From Life, September 29, 1941 – giant version here if you want to delve into the story.