A Couple of Lead Balloons

I thought it was just an ordinary headache at first. At first, I thought maybe it was Carl’s insistance on us wearing red at all times. I know his red suit made my eyes hurt. But aspirin didn’t make the pains go away.

And then I saw them up there, hovering near the ceiling: some familiar, huge, black and white disembodied heads. And I knew those two: it was dear old Mom and Dad, that’s who. Parents: you just can’t get away from them, right? It must be the strings tied onto the end of the balloons: invisible, sure – but there, all the same.

Mom, Dad, I shouted up at them, What are you doing here?

Dad said: Don’t marry Carl, Sheila. He’ll make you miserable!

And Mom chimed in: His way of life is wrong…and sinful.

Um, could you possibly be a little more specific? I said.

Mom said: Well, take a look at that red suit of his, for one thing. That is a sin against fashion, for a start.

And Dad added: And I think he dyes his hair, too. Nobody in the world was ever born with that shade of orange – not even Bozo the Clown!

Carl gave me a funny look. “Sheila darling,” he said, “I knew there was something strange about you. My parents warned me about this! They said: don’t marry Sheila, Carl – she talks to invisible balloons up on the ceiling and says they are her parents. What sort of girl comes from a family of black and white parade balloons?”
I sighed. Hadn’t Mom and Dad warned me that I should marry another balloon head and not try to pass as a Regular Girl? Just be myself, in black and white, up on the ceiling. Because these magic red pants weren’t going to work forever, you know. Soon I’d be a big headed balloon again, just like them. And I had a feeling Carl wasn’t going to be too impressed.

[From Cover Browser - bigger version over there, too.]

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15 thoughts on “A Couple of Lead Balloons

  1. I don't like the way Carl is standing. He looks mean. I think Sheila should run like the wind.Mom is probably whispering that same advice to Shelia. "Take a powder, Sheila, and slip out the back door, or you'll end up a battered wife like me. Look what your father did to my face this time. Save yourself!"

  2. Sheila regretted her marriage the second they arrived home from their honeymoon and Carl insisted on only ever speaking to her from behind, saying that "Those red capri pants of yours are louder than the lounge!"

  3. FreshHell – Thank you :)Beth – I know, they have so much in common! Barbara – Oh no, this is very common…Sassy Lassies Vintage Life – That is just how I feel most mornings.Jennifer – I don't know, but on Alexa they seem to think that most people ending up here are searching for toilet paper and/or Dixie Cups. Have not wanted to analyze this too much.Dr. Julie-Ann – That's the plot of the next issue.Melanie – And who could blame her? ;)Eric – Girls, I think. But I don't know why they would enjoy this sort of thing.Francy – You should see some of the other covers! It was hard to choose among them. I'll be going back again, I'm sure.Bill – Yes, that disembodied mom knows more than she's saying.Tori – I agree. I do not like that Carl and I don't like his red suit either. Perhaps he is Santa's evil cousin?Kath – You've read this series before! lol

  4. And note the way the girl making the bad decisions has thunder thighs. All the girls with great decision making abilities have lithe limbs and tiny waists, everyone knows that!

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