Ed is pretty darn excited about his Sunday fun. He’s showing off his cankles, and he’s all spiffed up in his three piece suit, ready to chat.
But his neighbour Tom has not, I suppose, had any Postum yet. And therefore does not see what fun it would be to be in Ed’s slippers (I am not sure that it ever would seem like fun, but never mind). So Tom is going to stay perfectly calm until he gets the whole story:
I can’t get very excited ’til I learn what this swell treat was!
Tom needs details, you see. Heaven knows what he’s expecting to hear about. But probably not something like – bran muffins:
Piping hot bran muffins, made with 40% Bran Flakes! Man, were they good!
Ed is on a mission. He must tell people about how much he liked his bran muffins. He goes into a whole lecture about bran and regularity and – well, just head over to the larger version (link below) if you’d like to learn what Ed did. And “Mrs. Ed”* chimes in, reminding Tom that Bran Flakes are on sale!
It takes a few months – and we won’t be inquiring too closely into that – but Tom, of course, does what he’s supposed to, buys the flakes, eats a LOT of bran and – yes, happiness all around! More hysterical excitement. Soon the whole neighborhood will be dancing and singing and extolling bran – just like those Viagra commercials from a few years ago. Wow, who knew bran was so incredible?
And not are only the people happy – even the cereal bowl can’t help breaking into song down at the bottom. It’s the Ethel Merman of whole grains: “Life is swell – when you keep well!” It’s a good thing those Bran Flakes are only 40%. Imagine what they’d be doing – and doing to you! – if that percentage was any higher.
*Which makes the Bran Guy “Mr. Ed,” right? I guess this is the result of all those bran muffins.
[From Life, July 24, 1939; bigger version here. Oh, and I had to change the title because I already used it, last year...I knew it sounded familiar! The guy in the 2009 Branderful Life post was excited about 100% Bran - please note that he is a Disembodied Head, too - not sure what to make of that...]