It’s back to school time (not quite yet for some of us, but soon enough) and here is a little retro homework tip for you all, from Ginger’s older brother:
1. Make friends with a giant bottle of Seven-Up. Tell it you like it. You can sense that it also likes you! (Maybe there is some bizarre dating opportunity in here, but let’s just leave that one alone for now).
2. Sit down together with your homework. Open up a few books and place them decoratively around the desk light. Try not to knock them over with your elbow.
3. Put your arm around the Seven-Up bottle and give it a smoldering look of desperation. Gosh, I thought you said you knew how to do long division (burp).
4. Realize that you have been transformed into an awkward line drawing with strangely proportioned arms and hands, and a tiny sunburned head. What in the world are they putting in Seven-Up these days?
5. Wait for the giant soda bottle to answer you. Read a few comic books while you are waiting.
6. Tell the teacher the next day that you couldn’t do the math homework because some strange Seven-Up bottle wandered into your room and spilled soda all over the desk.
7. Next day: see if Pepsi is any good at American history.
Thank you Janet at Found In Mom’s Basement, who found the ad at Community LiveJournal (link is on her page).