Once more, here is the tragic story of someone who isn’t using the right soap, or in this case, the right toothpaste – and thereby puts his or her entire social life in jeopardy.
Sometimes that’s just an excuse though. Because a lack of Colgate is not the only problem with Not So Hot Dan (the Non Mustard Man*). How does he fall short?
- Well, the dog says that Dan “pulled a boner.” Ahem. All right then. Back in the day, this was slang for “made a mistake.” But still.
-Stuffing oneself into a doghouse is also a mistake. This has nothing to do with dental hygiene.
-Taking advice from a bossy child named Cookie.
-Oh, and from the 1957 version of Triumph the Insult Comic Dog.
-And finally, for not brushing his teeth in the first place.
-And for wearing a silly yet boring red bow tie. Boring because it does absolutely nothing! Tomorrow I’ll show him (and you) the sort of tie he ought to be wearing. After he goes out and buys some Colgate, of course.
This delightful comic strip ad dates from 1957 and comes from the equally delightful Medicine and Madison Avenue collection. You can see it clearly over there, sorry about that. I’ve been trying to get it to scan better but as you see, not with a huge amount of success.
* My dear pal Heather sent me another Hot Dan ad and it is fabulous! I am working on writing something worthy of it. It is really excellent.
Suddenly, Pee-Wee Herman all makes sense.
Wasn't Cookie in the old TV show Father Knows Best? Sure looks like the same kid.
Eric – To me, he will never ever make any sense! Tori – She probably was, on her days off from castigating adults.
LOL at Triumph! I've also noticed how easily a lack of something (proper digestion, the correct toiletries, et al.) can terrorize a person's social life. These ads crack me up!
Heather – Yes, these ads all make ordinary things seem like quite the obstacle course.
"Well, the dog says that Dan "pulled a boner."*snickers loudly*Can somebody please put that annoying child in the doghouse?
Hairball – What an excellent idea.
No member of the male sex should wear a red bow tie and expect to get dates. Not even Tucker Carlson.
Shay – He really does look a bit like Tucker Carlson, lol!
Clean teeth won't make much of a difference now that he has dog hair all over his suit.
Bill – That's very true. His problems are far deeper than toothpaste can reach…
The dog's right. Dan's in the doghouse because he pulled a boner. One that wasn't his. And the wife found out.