What strange amusement park
Straight out of a bad dream
Or possibly out of the pages
Of a Merck Manual
Can this ride be from?
On Laxative Merry-Go-Round?
Not merry. No thanks.
But later on, still more to endure:
The Rollercoaster of Bad Moods,
The Tunnel of Enough,
The Tilt-A-Hurl,
The Haunted Subconscious House.
Then it will be time for a snack:
Cotton cavity candy,
Imitation popcorn with imitation fake butter ,
And soda that belches in the cup
then jumps out and spills on your pants.
Tomorrow all right?
Sparkling bright?
It will be when I wake up
To eye-searing sunlight striping venetian blinds,
My tickets gone.
Or else I could just close the magazine on this ad,
Either one.
This whole ad is just… wrong.
Stop the laxative merry-go-round, I want to get off!I’m at a loss as to how a “candy-coated” laxative (yuck) can make you “look better.” Are you supposed to apply it topically?
–Beth (aka “Edna”)
No restlessness or sudden necessity.I am in awe at your poetic ability btw.
And soda that belches in the cupthen jumps out and spills on your pants.Who needs the NR Amusement Park when we can just visit the funland of Lidian’s mind?
Tori – It certainly is.Beth – I think it must be a 50s version of ‘chocolated’ Ex Lax. Ugh.Max – Indeed not…And thank you.Bill – It’s quite a Coney Island in there (in here?), at that.
I don’t know why, but I got a weird mental image of a merry go round with toilets on the poles instead of horses. It is still all very disturbing to me…
It’s an “all vegetable” laxative…errr, why not just eat vegetables?
With a spot of Bovril, of course.
Eric – That certainly is a disturbing image.GoRetroGirl – Indeed, why not eat vegetables? Just exactly the sort of excellent question they do not want people to be asking.
Ugh. At Nature’s Remedyland Fun Park, the employees grumbled when management assigned them to operate the “Laxative Merry-Go-Round.” But it wasn’t the worst job at the park. They all pitied the poor saps unlucky enough to be working the dismally long shifts at the “Fleet Enema Fun House.”
Brandon – I’m staying out of that one, yes indeedy.
*laughs evilly* We could start a lot of trouble with a pound of the candy coated variety and a cookie recipe!
Hairball – LOL, we sure could!