So let’s understand this. You will get a box of something that is better than, oh, say, imported Belgian chocolates, for example – plus you will lose a pound a day guaranteed. And you don’t need to “cut down on food.”
That really is an “amazing discovery of science”! Those scientists worked hard on this one, all right, ordering in dozens of pizzas and celebrating the birthdays of every scientist in history with daily cakes. And then everyone had a kelp chaser or two. What a lot of experimental chomping they must have done, just so we could have this Delicious Kelpidine Candy Plan!
Now, kelp does actually have some health benefits. It is high in iodine, and is used to treat goiter. And it stimulates the thyroid, which is why it is still used in some weight-loss supplements. I guess that was the idea here.
Still, I don’t know how you would make the culinary equivalent of a champagne truffle out of it. But apparently if Kelpidine is not more yummy than your most favorite candy – they will return your money.
That being the case, I am surprised that they got to keep any money, really. Because somehow the words “delicious” and “Kelpidine” just don’t go together. And I don’t think what is happening to the lady waiting there on the scale is going to happen to anyone who isn’t a line drawing. They always lose weight really fast, you know.
Kelpidine may be an early incarnation – or rival, depending on the date (which I don’t know, I’m guessing late 60s to mid 70s) – of Ayds diet candy (from the 70s to the early 80s, chockful of benzocaine), because this racket calls itself the American Healthaids Company (Candy Division). I love that, don’t you? They make health products and they have a Candy Division!
Oh, and by the way – you can buy Chinese kelp candy over here. Just in case you were curious. It doesn’t claim to make you lose any weight, though.
Thank you so much to tmat1075 at Flickr for the ad.