A Susan Boyle moment of the mid-1950s: great singing voice, too bad about that hair.
Here we have two lovely, gossiping ladies (the 1954 version of internet commenters) saying: “Isn’t it a pity about stringy-haired little Kitty!* The other Kallen kids are so cute!”
These ladies are pros. They can diss people in rhyme! They are the ones who should be up there in front of the microphone, doing a little ladylike retro rapping.
But it transpires that even Kitty thinks no one likes a singer with “gruesome hair.” Honestly, Kitty, it looks OK to me. But once she discovers the right shampoo her hair “is as big a hit” as her voice. Which means – what, exactly? Does it sing too? Or rap?
Now, that would be worth buying a bottle of Halo for. Definitely.
[*Kitty Kallen was a popular singer of the 1940s and 50s, best known for her 1954 hit "Little Things Mean A Lot."]
Advertisement (1954) from Ad Access. There’s a big version there, so you can read the whole saga if you like (if I make the images too big here, it’ll take about an hour to load the site, so…I don’t). But you can probably imagine it from here.