The Wallet Wardrobe

In Retrogirlworld, there is no end to the matching that has to happen – and I’m not talking about matchmaking. This matching business is, if you will, the prerequisite to the matchmaking.

Because in order to look your absolute kickiest most fabulous best, you just have got to MATCH. Match the dress to the shoes, the shoes to the hose, all that stuff to the purse, the legbone’s connected to the hipbone…All that.

But most importantly, your wallet has simply got to match all that other stuff. If people notice that your wallet is Revolutionary Red, or Cosmic Purple, or Boring Black – why, there’s no telling the consequences.

And you certainly won’t be in fashion. Oh the horror.

I notice that girlfriend in the picture up there has a pretty unmatchy dress thing on, though. I do see a little yellow in it. But it is busier than Times Square on New Year’s Eve. And the lime green vest! That doesn’t match. It clashes! It all clashes! Why contradict the basic premise of the ad? She might as well have some accessories in Revolutionary Red.

Do not make this mistake. Retrogirls of the world, unite! And please, please take note of the very matchy, very yellow Wallet Wardrobe above. Wardrobe is an interesting choice of words. I don’t suppose you’re supposed to wear the wallet on your dress – are you? Or make the dress out of the wallets?

Mind you, that could be interesting. And at least it would all- well, you know - match.

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10 thoughts on “The Wallet Wardrobe

  1. Oh, those glorious days when everything was done to conform. Thanks for reminding me of them. I’m off to search for just the right wallet for my tattered old blue jeans.That post was great fun :)

  2. hmmm ok…well I think this time both the dress and the wallets/purses are equally as ugly as each other…*cringe* I can’t believe people though that fashion was in, mind you they’ll probably look at us now in the future and cringe too.

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