Never Pour Gravy Without Permission

More etiquette tips, this time from a lovely book entitled Search Lights On Health, Light On Dark Corners (1894), which is a complete guide to all aspects of life, sold by subscription only in Toronto by the J.L. Nichols Company of 182 Spadina Avenue, Toronto. I’m just going to give you the more interesting rules, because you probably know about not drinking coffee from the saucer, and things like that.

A lot of these rules seem to concern gravy. I don’t know why.

- Never pour gravy on a plate without permission.

- Never put anything by force upon someone’s plate.

- If at dinner you are requested to help anyone to sauce or gravy, do not pour it over the meat or vegetables, but on one side of them.

- Should you, however, find yourself at a table where they have the old-fashioned steel forks, eat with your knife, as the others do, and do not let it be seen that you have any objection to doing so.

- Don’t attempt to talk with a full mouth. One thing at a time is as much as any man can do well.

- Should you be so unfortunate as to overturn or to break anything, you would make no apology. You might let your regret appear in your face, but it would not be proper to put it into words.

I can imagine the accidents that will happen if you force someone to accept a lot of gravy, and they do not want it, and then you become upset that steel forks are being used. But once the gravy disaster occurs, just look regretful! Don’t say anything! Indeed:

- If an accident of any kind soever should occur during dinner, the cause being who or what it may, you should not seem to note it.

No matter how much gravy is involved.